Do you back down from your boundaries and allow others to mistreat you? Do you ignore your needs so you can satisfy someone else’s needs? Do you ignore or minimize your feelings? Do you skip self-care because you’re busy taking care of everyone else and think you can do without? In other words, do […]
Some children don’t get much of a childhood. When children have to act like adults – taking responsibility for their siblings, parents, and running a household– there are lasting effects. What is a parentified child? A parentified child is one that has taken on some or all of their parent’s responsibilities. Out of […]
Healing from an unhealthy or toxic relationship involves learning to trust yourself again. Unhealthy relationships erode your ability to trust yourself Unhealthy or toxic relationships can destroy your trust in others. For example, if your partner cheated on you or called you derogatory names, it makes sense that you may have trouble trusting […]
When a relationship ends or isn’t going well, it’s natural to reflect and wonder whether there were signs — or red flags — that your partner wasn’t a good match. You might find yourself thinking: Did I miss something? Were there signs that this relationship wasn’t going to work out? Why do I keep […]
Seeking Self-Forgiveness: How to Forgive Yourself and Put an End to Self-Criticism Using Self-Compassion. As perfectionists and codependents, we tend to be overly self-critical. Sometimes we make significant mistakes, we hurt others, we screw things up in a big way, and need to apologize and make amends. However, often we’re harsh with ourselves for […]
Are you an all-or-nothing thinker? Perhaps you see yourself as a success or a failure, attractive or disgusting, smart or stupid. And you see others as with you or against you, right or wrong, thoughtful or selfish. Seeing things as absolutes, black or white with no shades of gray in between, can leave you […]
What is toxic shame? Shame is often confused with guilt. Sometimes we use the terms interchangeably, but they mean different things. Guilt is the bad feeling you have when you’ve done something wrong. And if you’ve actually done something wrong, like run into your neighbor’s car, then you should feel bad. Guilt, in this […]
Trying to please everyone is tiring. It’s also a waste of time! When you try to be all things to all people, no one is happy. You suffer because you give and give but don’t receive in return. Your health and well being are depleted and you eventually grow tired and resentful. And despite […]
Increase happiness Are you feeling discouraged about your health, your job, or the political climate in our country? Are you worried about a loved one who is struggling? Do you feel stuck in a toxic or unfulfilling relationship? Are you lonely or wondering if you’ll ever find the one? You’re certainly not alone in […]
Do you try to avoid your feelings – especially your “negative feelings”? Are your feelings overwhelming? Do you regularly numb out with food, alcohol, or technology to avoid your feelings? Are you trapped by negative feelings that you can’t seem to shake? Or do you frequently feel numb or nothing? Feelings can certainly be […]